Circles and More Circles and More

Circles and More Circles and More

If you were a geometric shape (e.g. square, circle, isosceles triangle, etc.), what would you be and why?

So I am going to do part of the The Finicky Cynic “June ‘Jour’ Challenge” I am rather late in it, but this prompt stood out to me the most. It took me no time to answer either. What geometric shape would I be…hmm, easily, a circle?

So why a circle? A circle is too me the basic, original geometric shape that has the deepest meaning. It’s the basic design leading into the Flower of life symbol which is said to be the design that created the universe. As every math problem, every line, every thought stems from the creation of the Flower of Life. It is only right I pick something that represents the deepest part of me.

The Flower Of Life

 The Flower Of Life 

The flower of life is part of the sacred Geometry our ancestors some how strangely knew of. The great ancient civilizations in our human history all shared this one symbol. It can be found in every major religion some are remixed into portions of the symbol, but overall, it reaches every cornerstone of the world. It can seen etched in stone and clay tablets in flow with the story of their civilization. Somehow, the civilization knew all about this symbol with no connections with each other. How is that even possible?

The makings of the symbol consist of evenly drawn circles overlapping each other to form flower like symbols. It’s actually very easy to make with a protractor. you just draw a circle and then at the anywhere on the line of the circle you place the point of the protractor and draw the same pattern over and over. It’s quite the learning experience as every inch, every placement counts.

This symbol is everywhere in nature. As for me, while going through my spiritual journey I was enamored at the mass of information I was receiving. Learning I am part of everything and everything is part of me is astounding. A Circle is never ending as I am never ending. We are never ending. We are always is!

How fun is that…( better then being told I’m a sinful, dirty beast, born into a evil world and wickedness).

Here is SpiritScience  Better in-dept explanation on The Flower Of Life. These People are just Ah-May-Zing!

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A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 3

A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 3

June pressed forty in the elevator. The door closed revealing an image of us in the reflection. My fur coat really complimented my brown skin so well as if the fur grew from me.  I thank June for the dinner he treated me too. He insisted we go so we didn’t have to waste our matching attire. I don’t know why, but I just wanted to run to his home and let go and let God.  I am grateful though that he treated me to Thai cuisine.  My heart is still racing from the time I left my home to meet him to now. In this elevator, which seem such a long ride, I wanted to pull the stop cord and peel his clothes off. My lust needed to be quenched in an exotic place. I kept staring at him through the reflection. He caught my eyes and chuckled.

I walked into his condo that vacuumed me into another realm. I always looked around his apartment with astonishment. I dropped my suitcase over by the door to explore. This isn’t the first time I’ve been here, but each and every time I felt like a kid in Disney Land. The apartment is enormous with two floors connect with a cream carpeted spiral staircase. I made my way to the left first like always to examine the five foot fish tank puzzled in the wall.  The floor-to-ceiling windows embraced the New York City skyline and Hudson River. My mouth dropped at the amazing night view knowing the morning  touch from the sun will awaken me from my sleep. ” You know what my mother told me when I was kid?” I said to June still looking out. “We were driving around the city one day and she just randomly said, ‘You notice how white people never have any curtains,’ and ever since I always seen it to be true,” I laughed. June gently touched my shoulders from behind slowly grazing his hands on my fur until he reached my waist. He pulled me close to him. “Sweetheart, wealthy people don’t have curtains,” he whispered, then preceded to take off my coat.

A warm rush of emotions flooded my body when he took kissed my neck. I remained immobilized by the view and his kiss. He took my hand and we started to head up stairs, I told him to wait so I can take off my shoes and not ruin the carpet floor. From his phone, June set the tone of the night by putting on the 90’s R&B station on Pandora which filled the entire house with music. We both had a deep love for old school music.  We forward upstairs when I saw little candle lights that bordered they walls around the entire second floor of the condo. I paused at the romance constructed for me. He laughed gesturing me to continue to follow him. The white candles against the soft beige carpet trailed into red candles that lead to the bathroom and the master bedroom.

“This is beyond far so sweet of you. You are doing so much for me right now!” I couldn’t take the smile off my face.
“You keep talking you are going to blow of the candles,” June chuckled put his hand on my lips. He pulled my soul into the dim lit bathroom and immediately started to get undressed.  White and red rose petals were scattered across the floor accompanied by more white candles. The bathroom room was smelled of fresh linen. I took a deep breath still stumbling over the fantasy that turned true. I couldn’t comprehend the reason behind all of this. I wanted to abruptly stop him in his tracks and ask why? Why me? However, that will ruin the moment so I kept my pretty lips shut. Being so paralyzed in excitement, I forgot to take my clothes off with him. “Are you not going to take off your clothes? You do this every time you come here” June asked unbuckling his belt. The perfectly sculpted body brown body funneled into the deep v line that marked the sides of his waist. The puts collapsed taking the boxers with it showing the thickness of his core.

I swallowed my shyness, “Why don’t you take off my clothes for me?” I asked. His smile of pearls  came towards me leading me up against the door. He closed the door while grazing my lips with his. His finger tips took hold of my shirt that lifted over my head. Both of his arms were placed above me against the wall as we continued to lock tongues. I melted feeling the sleek soft yet heard blend of his chest and abs.  He stood naked in front of me pushing me harder against the wall. Everything about his existence tantalized my senses.  His athletic build, his strong hands, his defined legs, his full lips, his glossy wide eyes all perfectly placed in my favor. Again, he interlaced his hands with mine and pulled me towards the Jacuzzi. His bare body went in first still kissing me from my lips to my neck. “Wait a minute,” I said realizing I still had on my jeans. He completely ignored me and started to pull into closer into the water. “Wait, June, Wait! I still have on my jeans.”

“You want me to be mean,” He said still being very busy on my neck. His passion kisses had me too giddy to repeat myself. Sitting in the water knee deep, he took his arms and being to lift me. “Wait!” I screamed. I tried pulling him off me, but I continue to succumb into his paradise. “Get over here!” He said lifting all of me into the water. A huge splash of water tip over the brim of the tub into the rose pedals, “JUNE! WHAT THE FUCK!”

June blurted into a rainfall of laughter, this asshole intentionally wanted to pull me into the water half dressed. I got up out of the warm water completely drenched in attitude. I scolded him for the stupidity and the difficult it is to now have to remove wet pants. It felt disgusting closed on my skin. June continued to laugh and laugh and laugh hysterically. I started to chuckle with him still upset at what he did. “It’s not funny, you asshole!” I blurted.  I took off my pants slowly showing off the side of my hips. “Yeah, now that’s taking off your clothes sexy!” June said pumping his fist into the air. I shot a stern look at him and flicked him the middle finger, “Fuck you!”

“I will be doing that in the bed shorty, don’t worry,” he said. I rolled my eyes when I really wanted to bat my lashes, but that will show he won so quickly when he didn’t…well he did, but I’m not going to show him.

A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 2

A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 2

 

read Part 1 here 

“What would you like to order?” The waitress asked in the most courteous voice. “I’ll take the Dancing Chicken with brown rice,” I ordered. “And I will take the Crying Tiger with brown rice as well.” Anya added. “And what would you like to drink with that?” “Two cranberry juices in the largest size you have,” Anya said. “But who said I wanted cranberry–” “Shh! be quiet girl and yes that will be all,” Anya said,  outpouring her smile that can steal Wall St Investors wallets. I shook my head and rolled my eyes from knowing how Anya already acts with her robust self. She grabbed her black lambskin Christian Dior bag from her hip and placed it on her lap and started ransacking inside. “Girl, what are you looking for?” I asked.  Anya pulled out her crystal craved flask. I know she was not about the spike our drinks with her liquor. This should not surprise me after the twelfth time she spiked our drinks at even the most tasteful restaurants. “That is so ghetto Anya put it away, like now.” I tried to obscure my eyes with my hand trying to hide away from the bashfulness. “Miss Thing…I make my own money, I have my own business, if want to bring liquor I will. Plus, this is not just any liquor. This is a twelve thousand dollar diamond distilled Kors Vodka.” Anya said.

I was nearly two seconds away from hurdling out my seat to slap some sense into her. Anya is still the same girl from our high school years when we used to venture up and down the streets of Harlem in our fresh new pairs of Jordan’s. Times have changed since, now we’ve moved up from the middle class . But damn, she still got that edge all up in her, especially in that luxurious vodka. I’m not even going to lie, I wanted a taste of this diamond vodka.

“You know,” Anya started, “You honestly should have gone with us on Jessica’s trip. We had such a blast! The men were dope, we got so many free drinks, I got into at least five clubs for free, and to top it off…I had this fine ass dark chocolate, football player looking, sex God tastes my treats!” Anya started to fan herself in excitement. “You know it’s been a long time coming since I had this kitty cat primed and polished. It was worth the wait. Can I get an Amen!”

“Amen!” I shouted, but this wasn’t I wanted to hear at this time. “But Yo! Let me finish telling you what happened.”

 

 

A Rose in a Hard Place

A Rose in a Hard Place

I grabbed and my phone and made my final decision to call him. After a few rings he answered, ” I am ready for you to pick me up,” I said. “Alright, I knew you wouldn’t let me down cutie,” he said. I can hear the smile in his voice. “Haha, right, so hurry up handsome.” I snapped on the two locks on my suitcase. I looked around to check and see if I wasn’t leaving anything I may need. I took a deep breath. Alright, I think we are good here. I took the keys, my suitcases, duffel bag, and head out the door. My heart is pacing really fast. I am not sure if I am nervous about where I am going or what I am leaving, either way the thrill is what I am following. I left my 44 floor building waiting outside with my belongings. They time read 10:37 pm.  I took out my cig. Fuck! I left my lighter upstairs, blah, I really don’t feel like going back up there again. I asked the lobby attendant if he had a lighter and luckily he did. I need a moment or two.

I was half down my cig when June pulled up in his all black Hennessey Venom that I helped him pick out a few months ago. He knew that was my favorite car.  My face broke into a deep smile. I was so excited to have seem him walk out that car wearing all black everything matching his baby car. I walked up to him planting a warm kiss on his buzz shaved cheek. ” Looks like a Giuseppe Zanotti night,” he said laughing. I looked down and saw his black and gold high top Giuseppe’s matched my gold suede Giuseppe also. “Oh my god, babe you are so right, we always randomly match somehow, I love it,” I said.  He helped my put my suitcases in the. He grabbed my wrist in middle of me joyfully throwing my bags in the backseat of his car. “Are you sure you want to do this,” he said staring directly into my eyes. I got uncomfortable and looked away. Direct stares makes me uneasy as if one can read the inside of my thoughts precisely. “Look at me,” he said grabbing my chin towards him.” Are you sure about this? I don’t want to force you into something you don’t want to do.” “No, I am not sure,” I said, “But I want to go with you. Just take me and give me an experience.” He kissed me on my neck. It put the wide crystal smile back on my face. “Alright, so let me take this,” he said taking off my St. Laurent sable fur coat.  June opened the front passenger door to his car. “Shotgun!” I yelled. “Bang, Bang, Bang,” he said.

I checked the time again and it read 10:45 pm. Okay, I have to text him something. June asked if I was OK and I assured him for the second time that I am. I’m just…well, I don’t know what I am at this point. I just want to get away for a moment. I scrolled down in my phone to where it said hubby. Hey my hero, I am going out with Jessica and the girls tonight down in the city for some drinks, then off to the weekend trip. There is some pizza left in the oven. That’s all, love ya <3. “Who are you texting?” June asked. I flinched. “Oh it’s no one important, just my best friend. I am telling her I can’t make it to girls night tonight,” I said.
“So, you’re saying your best friend is not important?”
“Oh, you know what I mean, boy.”
” I am just asking!”  We chuckled. He started the car that immediately blasted Drake’s new album. The heavy bass rattled my skin. “So where do you want to go?” “To your place,” I said.  I looked him and saw his pearly whites against the black interior of the car. I exchanged the same smile with him. He sang along to the song horribly, but I didn’t mind. I wanted to make him as happy as possible.

The Gritty (part 3)

The Gritty (part 3)

Kasey walked over to me. “Don’t worry about Tommy he is just going through it. He is however the cunt one I was telling you about. Are you sure you don’t want to come with us to club reign?” she asked.  I really didn’t want to go honestly. I initially only came here to be with Tyree, but he brought me here to this environment instead the movies. “Nah. I am good. I’ll just go home,” I said. “Are you sure? You know it’s tranny night!” ” I am okay. For real,” I replied. ” I just don’t feel like being around all of that.” “Why? you know many of them?” she asked. I didn’t feel like opening up to her about my life and who I speak to. I don’t know her. “No, I don’t know any.” I lied. ” I want you to meet my friend, he is so dope. Plus he is a top.  He is so cute. Its his birthday so that’s what we’re celebrated for. I really want you to come its going to be fun.” I denied once more hoping she doesn’t ask me again before I get annoyed.

Tyree and Tommy came from the other room still in conversation about the loss in their family. I took a sip of my drink when the short Spanish lady who sniff coke intervened  again.  She made her self comfortable next to me  asking me for my number. She thinks I am so cool, though I only said last then a sentence. “Yeah my number is 555-671-3000.” I don’t know why I gave her my number, my real number at that. She put on her winter coat and left out the door.  The stranger sitting across from me was drunk to the point of no return. He had a bottle of Hennessy drinking it straight. I looked at him with a screwed face. How can people drink dark liquor with ease like that?  Kasey and I had started a new conversation. She is an interesting girl who is very affluent in this lingo and it made my question who she knows. Maybe we have the same friends and that wouldn’t be in my favor.

“Yeah, my shit was laced. I am telling you. I was fucking with this doctor who I was his assistant for. He was married and everything and still was hitting me off with a few dollars. That nigga wanted me to move in with him upstate. He had a summer-house up there he said I could stay in. He’s a Jew so you know what that means…”

“That he has money, lots of it,” I said, laughing. Tommy and Tyree disappeared into the back room again.
“You damn right, well anyways, I– Wait, why are y’all always talking in the room? Y’all being mad disrespectful to your guest here,” Kasey said to Tommy and Tyree.
“This is my house!” yelled Tommy “N-No one is going to tell me how to run m-my house, okay?”
“But damn boy, why are you acting so shady all of a sudden that is not cute. I am your sis you, don’t you do that!”
Tommy smiled and they decided to hug and exchange I love you’s a few times.

“That is my sis, Me and Tommy been through it all, especially when we out looking for dick. I am telling you Tommy be getting the niggas. You may be a little old now, but that bitch knows how to hustle. Shit, they be after him more than me and I am the girl. They be saying, ‘I don’t want you, you got a pussy I can that in the morning.”

“Are you serious?” I said taking a sip of my vodka and Dr. pepper mix. “Where you do you guys do this at.” I grew a strong sense of curiosity. It seemed so daring, thrilling, and exciting to go out to the unknown and cruise people. Like trick or trick for adults. I wanted to know more. I wanted to her to show me where, but there’s a time and place.
” Right here, in the Bronx on the other side of the four train it’s heavy in that area. Yo! one time we had to run for our lives like dead ass. Some nigga pulled out a knife on us and we had to fight our way out.
“For real? Oh my God, wow that is crazy what happened?” I asked.
” We was sucking the guy off in the staircase and then he just started panicking thinking we was going to tell people on his block about it. Then he pulled out a knife. That was the first time I say Tommy actually fight. I was not expecting his gay ass to buck down but he held his own, ya know.”

“Wait, what happen with the Jewish doctor?” I took another sip.

 

 

The Gritty ( part 2 )

The Gritty ( part 2 )

As I was walking up the steps, I saw a grown man fair-skinned with a scruff face. Tyree introduced him to me immediately, “This is Donovan I was telling you about earlier that was coming.” Tommy looked at him with a strong stare without saying a word. I started to feel unwelcome already. I was the last to walk into the door leaving me face to face with tommy. I told him thank you for having me and reached out to shake his hand. He ignored it and gave me a hug instead. “You’re welcome, you can sit at the corner in the chair.” I sat down and got comfortable making sure all my belongs were together. By the looks of it everybody already had to be older than me by at least a decade.

This other grown man was already drunk in front of me. He was so incoherent I probably appeared as a mirage to him.  Soon this short Spanish lady started talking to me out of random. “Yes, sweet heart, have yourself a drink. You know my man doesn’t even know that I am. I am soon about to go before he gets home,” the random lady said swaying side to side marinated in her liquor. “You know, what my man doesn’t know will not hurt him. I do a little…” She gestured her hand to her nose. “And my kids don’t know either. I have older kids about twenty-two and twenty-four, also I got my youngest daughter of two.” I started to then question her age if her oldest kid and I are the same age. Then to have a younger daughter of only two years, what age did she start having kids? ” I am 42,” she continued. “It is nobody business what drugs I do. I do my drugs for myself and not anybody else. So no one, especially my kids, can think they have the right to do it.” Although drunk, she made a valid point.  She continued in her ramblings about her and her friends and how they party about. I sat there listening and agreeing to everything she said. I don’t know her.

Tommy came out from his room showing me a picture of his Godparents. “This is a picture of my parents, I call them my parents because  didn’t know my real parents.” His godmother looked so pretty in her 1960’s glam hair style, her body pinched in a silver dress, and her lashes  with heavy eyeliner. “She looked like a party goer,” I said. “yeah, she was but she just passed, you still  have your mom around?” Tommy asked. “Yeah, I do.” I responded.  “Well, cherish her because my godmother was all I had and now she is gone.” Tommy started to weep empty tears, but I felt the pain inflicted on him from this realization. Tyree came from behind him, “Yo, what the hell I told you about tell everybody your passing. You not gonna’ learn are you? People are out here ready to take advantage of your ass and you’re out here being a bitch in front of strangers.” “Look!” Tommy blurted, “I am a grown ass man and this is my house and I can do what ever the hell I want too. Tyree, we have to talk come with me in my room.”

The Gritty

The Gritty

Damn, It is so cold I hope I don’t get stood up again, I thought. I paid the cab driver twenty dollars  wishing him a safe and good night. I stood right on the corner and gave him a call.  He didn’t pick up. It had to be sixteen degrees outside and Lord knows I don’t want to be out here for long. I saw the street sign counting down from 20 seconds and ran across the Grand Concourse to the other side. Maybe if I wait half way into the subway I won’t be too cold. I was making my way down the steps when someone called me. It was a middle-aged black man with his lips swollen.
“Hey sir, I’m sorry I know it’s cold I came from the shelter that’s around the block behind Taft High School, I need help with getting my ID in Brooklyn. It’s kind of hard asking people out here, you know man, this one guy thought he was too good to help me.”

I looked at him and shook my head. “Yeah, okay do you need help getting on the train I can swipe you on–”
“No,” He interrupted,” I can get on the train with no problem, I just need help with money for getting my ID, you see this?” He pointed to his fist. I saw one huge, dry, ashy, cold knuckle. “My main man, was telling me not to act a fool and rob people.”
” Yeah, don’t do that sir, it’s no need for all of that it is way too cold!” I said. He continued asking if I can help him with anything and I stood there thinking what I should do. Should I lie and say no? or break my twenty and give him ten?
“Well, lets look for a store and I will help you out with something.” I said. He sighed in great relief. We found a store several feet away where I broke the twenty and gave him two fives.
“Yo, man thank you so much, I am so grateful. I seen you cross the street and wanted to compliment your jacket also.” He said. I get compliments on my jacket quite often.
“Thank You and sure no problem.” I said. ” So what is your name?” He asked.
“My name is Donovan.” We walked back up the hill to the concourse and bid farewells when my phone started to ring.

It was Tyree. I seen him across the street standing tall with his Tim’s that match his beige jacket and hat. He was looking all other ways instead of in front of him when I approached him. He still looked the same from last week. Which made me a little at ease. “Yo, your here,” He said smiling. “I’m sorry that I had you waiting the other two times. I told you about my cousin in-law getting locked up and shit. I know we were suppose to go to the movies too–”
“Yeah, I know, but it is okay, now I am here. It’s cold as fuck now too.” I said. We walked down the hill. He was telling me how  they all drinking getting ready for the night.  He convinced me to get some liquor. I didn’t feel like drinking, merely because I didn’t want to be drunk in an unfamiliar place with strange people. “Okay, but I am getting the smallest thing of vodka,” I said. “Alright cool, and I’ll cover your drink,” he said.  I got me a little Barton’s Vodka. I never had that brand. I am not even a drinker. Liquor stores are as foreign to me as Spongebob is to being late for work.