A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 2

A Rose In A Hard Place: Chapter 2

 

read Part 1 here 

“What would you like to order?” The waitress asked in the most courteous voice. “I’ll take the Dancing Chicken with brown rice,” I ordered. “And I will take the Crying Tiger with brown rice as well.” Anya added. “And what would you like to drink with that?” “Two cranberry juices in the largest size you have,” Anya said. “But who said I wanted cranberry–” “Shh! be quiet girl and yes that will be all,” Anya said,  outpouring her smile that can steal Wall St Investors wallets. I shook my head and rolled my eyes from knowing how Anya already acts with her robust self. She grabbed her black lambskin Christian Dior bag from her hip and placed it on her lap and started ransacking inside. “Girl, what are you looking for?” I asked.  Anya pulled out her crystal craved flask. I know she was not about the spike our drinks with her liquor. This should not surprise me after the twelfth time she spiked our drinks at even the most tasteful restaurants. “That is so ghetto Anya put it away, like now.” I tried to obscure my eyes with my hand trying to hide away from the bashfulness. “Miss Thing…I make my own money, I have my own business, if want to bring liquor I will. Plus, this is not just any liquor. This is a twelve thousand dollar diamond distilled Kors Vodka.” Anya said.

I was nearly two seconds away from hurdling out my seat to slap some sense into her. Anya is still the same girl from our high school years when we used to venture up and down the streets of Harlem in our fresh new pairs of Jordan’s. Times have changed since, now we’ve moved up from the middle class . But damn, she still got that edge all up in her, especially in that luxurious vodka. I’m not even going to lie, I wanted a taste of this diamond vodka.

“You know,” Anya started, “You honestly should have gone with us on Jessica’s trip. We had such a blast! The men were dope, we got so many free drinks, I got into at least five clubs for free, and to top it off…I had this fine ass dark chocolate, football player looking, sex God tastes my treats!” Anya started to fan herself in excitement. “You know it’s been a long time coming since I had this kitty cat primed and polished. It was worth the wait. Can I get an Amen!”

“Amen!” I shouted, but this wasn’t I wanted to hear at this time. “But Yo! Let me finish telling you what happened.”

 

 

Summer Aromas

Freedom & Serenity

Summer Love

Pop! Goes the small cap on the lighter fluid before he sprinkles the kerosene on the dark carbon rocks. He strikes the match for the black bowl leading to a combustion of flames. The flames cradle the smell of summer to the top of my lip and I breathe in deeply the initiation of summer

I sit with my feet buried in the sand that still holds the warmth of the sun that settled under the horizon. My other two friends sidebar on topics I choose to not partake in. Not that it didn’t interest me, I just prefer to marvel in the moment.

I smell the dark colored sea reflecting the open skies that avails the moon and the stars. Plentiful it is tonight.  A circle of rocks margins the small fire created by me.

The moment is enhanced like a drug with music. Songs of the night that heightened my sense of well being where everything became aromatherapy.

Now I dance on the movable ground to the joyous of the many songs accompanied by nostalgia. I rip my two friends apart and we spin each other around and around then fall to the ground. Laughing hysterically at life and just being alive.

I got back up to dance with the waves and the salty ocean breeze.

Summer is here.

Daily prompt: summer scents
 
 Daily Prompt: Musical Marker 

What Am I To You…

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. -E.Gilbert Eat, Pray, Love,

I paused in mid sentence placing this book down looking up in mid air silenced in my thoughts. “Is this him” I thought for I have expressed many times how I have changed as a person through him. Through us being together. I want him to know I don’t want to hurt him although he may not trust me anymore. I want to say to him. It’s okay you don’t have to worry or be mad or upset or feel like you are any less than number one in my life. I always deep down promoted the need for him to always and for ever feel comfortable with me.

Knowing I’m don’t want to hurt him in anyway. I wanted him to have confidence in me in what ever I do even if it may go against his feelings. We would still be okay. I never wanted us to end up the way we did. I said many things he did not want to hear but to me it was my truth. As the hard to hear, unexplainable, words fueled even more raged in him. As his truth I could not accept but I did understand. We sounded like to people arguing about the sky being blue. One saying the north sky is blue and the other saying the south sky is blue. Two people arguing about the same side of the coin. No anymore right or wrong just experiences that can’t be agreed upon. Every time a finger is pointed it can be flipped and reversed. As if we walked in each others shoes feeling the same way about every situation at hand. Making it hard to equally except another’s feeling without saying..”I felt the same when  this occurred”

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. -Elizabeth Gilbert Eat Pray Love

I wanted him to tell me how I make him feel. That I make him happy. How special I make him feel. I didn’t want to assume or guess. I wanted to know. I wanted to know I was doing the right thing. Emotionally, I had a hard time to understand his emotional standpoint. He not really good in expressing those things. I assume he rather me not know.  This not knowing unconsciously made me reach more and do more, making my actions bigger and louder. Hoping he here’s my yearning for him to tell me…what he feels inside…through some actions I knew. However I wanted to hear or read these words like a vows in marriage.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master – e.gilbert eat pray love.

… Im not perfect as I thought I was. Nor was he as I thought he was. I however take pride in what I have done for him. He is the most stabled person I came in contact since my home friends in 2006. I met him in 2011 and been together ever since. Through that I have  had consistant change in my social life and the moment I lost in contact with him … I realized how much of my days were filled by him. The reason I kept my phone on. The reason to inspire me to explore new places. The reason I left my house. He gave me a reason to be proud of something. A purpose. A meaning. A goal,something to reach for, a craft to perfect. A human experience. He is more than he knows. I want to know how I am to him.