Dontae (noun): ….

Dontae(noun): [Blank]
When someone tries to ask me who am I, I try my hardest to be as brief as possible. Honestly, I would want to say nothing at all. Why? Because, saying nothing at all when asked that question is the ultimate freedom for me, but an extreme puzzle for another. I used to feel so guilty for myself and really be in this state of trance trying to describe myself. I felt as if i didn’t know myself. During the era of Myspace the “about me” section was so difficult! Any about me section for that matter.

Why do you have to give definition to your self’s instead of just being? Being in the moment and excepting who is front of you as they are. Do you know what I think happens as soon as someone gives definition to themselves? they start to label themselves. First impression is the lasting impression, and if you start labeling yourself other people will hold those labels as fact; as you are nothing more nothing less that what you announced you are. Let’s face it who really know who they are? With me I am constantly changing and adapting to situations. Therefore, there are things I have never experienced before and from that I don’t know how I will react or handle a situation at hand. What I say I am now I may not be tomorrow.

You have the right to remain silent what you say can and will be held against you in the human law. For instance, the picture posted here with this hands just saying “Just Me” is correct, but if you look deeper into it what is written in detail do you think that’s all she is? All the words around “just me” are just small compartments which we do to our self’s. Had it only say “just me” in plain letters it will automatically lead you to ask “And that is…?” No definition forces one person to accept what they see right now in the moment.Image

Recently, I spoke to an extremely close person to me who inspired me to write this post. I believed he defined himself to much into his career. Which is lovely, great, having the tunnel vision mindset is great when achieving your goals, but where is the depth of yourself. If you eat sleep breathe one thing can you relate to other people. What if that one thing was taking away from you? you are left out of your comfort zone to be stranded? To me, talking about the same thing over and over and doing the same thing over and over eventually tires me out. I need variety in things I involved myself in.

Also, I hate when people assume cause I do one thing or hobbies they have to immediately act or talk away to relate to me. No! I am more than what I say and do.
I am Indefinite like the universe we live in. I tried explaining this to him hoping to see maybe that’s were the slump came from. Humans need variety! The world is not Black and white so why should how we define our self’s be ? Just be and Do!

Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth”  – A. Watts


21 thoughts on “Dontae (noun): ….

  1. That is so true. It is like looking in a mirror for me.
    “First impression is the lasting impression, and if you start labeling yourself other people will hold those labels as fact; as you are nothing more nothing less that what you announced you are” = This is what people like. Only hearing a bit of you to have an answer on the question “do you know so and so” The answer they give is the same short and short minded as the answer they want. Only true listeners are people that care for you.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts it really touched me.
    #Begood and Why Matters!


  2. Pingback: Dontae (noun): …. by mesardonicmesarcastic | Violet Skye

  3. Said perfectly. I must agree, most of the time when people define themselves as such they end up being worlds apart anyway because of the changing you speak of we are never the same person we were yesterday. You said it best “I am more than what I say and do. I am Indefinite like the universe we live in.”


  4. I completely agree that I need to have variety in my life. I can’t do the same thing over and over and over again. That’s probably why I have such a wide variety of interests. I also hate when people think they can only have conversations to me about one thing. When they find out I play the piano, they only speak to me about music. I do more than just that! I mean I have an opinion on just about anything.


    • Yeah, I totally understand, the other day I ran into a guy that I knew from my job and out of all conversations were talking about work and I’m sitting there like “boy I clocked out of work almost a week ago” I understand people try to relate the best way the can by finding commonality but after a while its like tell me your favorite Starbucks beverage or something!


  5. Agree with you. No one can know anyone completely, because people are constantly changing and developing (I don’t like “growing” because changes aren’t always a growth, which implies moving forward along the same path). My wife, of nearly 35 years, and I are still finding out new things, and changing from what we once were. I was a chemist, then I moved into IT, then theology. I was into Boy Scouts, now I am part of Search & Rescue. How boring would life be if we remained the same person from the moment of graduation?

    One of my favorite answers to the question comes from an old TV series, Babylon 5, where an enemy ship is requesting permission to dock at the station. The security chief refuses, when they ask her who she is, her response was , “Who am I? I am Susan Ivanova, Commander. Daughter of Andre and Sophie Ivanov. I am the right hand of vengeance and the boot that is going to kick your sorry ass all the way back to Earth, sweetheart! I am death incarnate, and the last living thing that you will ever see. God sent me.”


    • Thank you for reading and Commenting!

      And to add, yeah in my relationship and even most relationships I’ve witnessed there’s these deep need to know 100 of a person in order to feel elevated or maybe fill an insecurity I don’t know. However, like you said we always in continuous in our human experience and the surprise and new things we discover about our self’s keeps us so interesting.

      Trust me, my dad has been the same for 30 years and trust me…his pride has stunted him for many years!

      Thank again for taking the time out to read and share =D


  6. I agree that people are too quickly to put labels on anything. But sometimes knowing how you define yourself , even if that means not doing so – makes a difference. Whether you tell anyone who you think you are, doesn’t always have a fighting chance if your prove yourself to be someone else.
    Some people take words too literally and what one word means to you means something else to someone else. I know I don’t like being defined and I know I hate feeling tied to anything let alone a definition of what someone else thinks I am. Who you are isn’t how others define you, but in terms of morals and values and what you believe for yourself a definition isn’t always the worst thing.
    People like black and white. But life is all grey area. People are grey area. No one will ever 100% understand someone else or themselves for that matter, but trying to put a label on someone is what people know how to do. It’s black and white. You are all that you think you are but you could be even more to someone else. Don’t corner yourself but use it as a stepping stone to build from. Let them figure out the rest as your story progresses.


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